Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Know What I Heard

Turn off your alarm and go to UCF not Seminole State, the college for AA degrees.

Need to Move On

I am lonely.  The only thing that can make me feel better is Hollywood, and key is acting.

I need to pick a college major so I get going when I go back.

Bye bye adult ballet as an idea etc.  My major will not be drama|music..

Problem

When I post to Ellen, they act like I'm not supposed to for certain reasons.  They just want me to go hysterical all the time like I have to worry about everything.

Question

Ellen, are you seeing this?

The Idea of Not Talking @ It

There is the idea I realize of me not talking @ this stuff to save time.  It made sense.

It's not so much about each specific thing as that I feel violated.  I said okay so I shouldn't have cursed, but it wasn't at anyone I feel.  If someone is mad or cautious @ me, that's how it has to be, I admitted that, too.

Problem

I think it's hard to post online because of when I hit stuff, but I hope I get better.

Problem

These people making noises in my room won't stop being mean, even after I said I am not listening to their sin and crime.  They are acting like I don't matter, what I say.

I'm not putting up at all at any time with the idea Tim Burton and Johnny Depp being mean are also because of me.  That's just being used as an excuse that they did nothing wrong, but that doesn't even make sense.

You Weird People

You are overly sensitive to language and can't get that I'm innocent.  Are you still upset about my not being able to succeed in college since you started putting noises in my room?

Problem

They are loading the page funny again and looking for attention.  It was like a feeling of side to side.  My dad has a funny bone in his nose I don't have, and it makes me feel that.

Felt Bad There

Ellen can't get her listening to my dad is mean.  How can I even look at her?  My mom was just being mean again.  I'm not into Ellen's punishing stint of me.  Is that because of Johnny Depp?  You know, he has a family who probably don't like him to be the instigator of other's ways.  You know, my dad was also funning me.

Why should I feel guilty for cursing about the noises in my room and being upset in particular at Ellen for acting like she's punishing us?  I bet it's something like we're not young enough to be her kids.

I was actually mad at my mom but moreso that people are saying I used to curse at Ellen all the time, I guess her = the noise.

Issue

Because of Tim Burton, we all are made to feel worthless cuz we're not successful in Hollywood, for those of us who were interested.  He might think I'm saying something twisted and punishable.  It's the cold hard truth, something for him to feel guilty about possibly or the people who take advantage of things because of him.

Tragedy

A lady was clapping annoyingly behind me and it off-ed my clap, which was not very loud.  I was so sad, as the Tai twins were to perform a dance they learned from the black DJ.

More

She almost came up to me when we were dancing.

She stood up where I was possibly twice.

I think she almost fell over from my screaming.  I screamed high but not shrill.

I was dressed all in pink.  I had to use a nice sweater I found that was a rich darker pink over a light hot pink.  I was so dazzled the 2nd lady guest wore a light hot pink dress, as well.  She's an old friend sorta.

Ellen had indents on the side of her face like above her temples.  I could tell when she was on the other side.

Trip

I got 2 of those cute little teen magazines with puzzles.

Sorry - There I was!

Next time, I'll say I'm going to be absent.

I was in LA in the audience of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show."  I flew there and back in a day.

It was so amazing to see Ellen in real life, though she doesn't seem very real.  It's hard to remember what she was like.

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